Best Foot Forward Read online

  “I’ll see you tomorrow, Katy.”

  Grace couldn’t possibly explain everything to Katy, but she knew she couldn’t safely stay in a relationship with Brad. This Friday she had to do it. Brad said he loved her and claimed he wouldn’t push her into physical intimacy, but if she believed him, she might actually fall in love with him. And if she fell in love, she wouldn’t have the willpower to say no to him. And after she gave in, he would break up with her, and leave her a ruined mess. If she was honest with herself, she should’ve broken up long ago. Brad was just too likeable. But it would hurt less now, than later.

  They were going to be alone at his apartment Friday night, and she knew exactly what would happen. She would let him kiss her, but she would keep her head about her. He would repeat that declaration of love, and this time he would try to talk her into being intimate, just like every other guy in the past. And the moment he pushed her, she would use that as an excuse to break up with him.

  The best thing to do is get it over with... like ripping off a bandage.

  She blinked hard as her eyes stung. I’m really going to miss him.

  *****

  Brad had a sick feeling in his gut, and he didn’t think he’d caught the stomach virus he’d diagnosed at least forty times in the hospital emergency room earlier in the day. No, this uneasy mood started after his earlier phone conversation with Grace. It was Friday night and he was waiting for her to show up at his apartment, fighting against a sense of impending doom. She’d been acting strangely for the past week, ever since he’d accidentally said, “I love you.” She’d gone a bit wacky on him at the time, but the next day on the phone she’d seemed back to normal. He’d hoped his slip-up hadn’t caused any permanent damage.

  Brad had dated a lot of girls, but Grace was special. He still remembered the first time he laid eyes on her on a hiking trail with her three tall-and-lanky sisters and two girlfriends towering over her five-foot-two frame. She was tiny, but her personality was huge. She was the boss, and she knew it. She was cute and fun with boundless energy and a contagious enthusiasm for life, though she had a tendency to be a bit absent-minded at times.

  He fell for her the first time she winked at him with her gorgeous hazel eyes when they met on a hiking trail. It was the perfect way to meet, since she loved sports as much as he did. Every other girl he’d dated had simply tolerated his interest in sports, but Grace was downright passionate about the subject. She especially loved baseball—his own personal favorite—and he hadn’t found a single outdoor activity she wouldn’t try. She was fearless. With parachuting and bungee-jumping already marked off her bucket list, he wondered what dangerous sport she would attempt next. But most of all, Grace was the kindest girl he’d ever met—the kind of person who would give you her shoes if you needed them and walk home barefooted.

  Brad knew he had to tread carefully to keep her. In fact her sister, Olivia, had pulled him aside one night at the weekly Marshall family Sunday dinner to warn him he would face a challenge if he didn’t want to be thrown out in the cold. Evidently, Grace had a track record of dating one guy for a short time before dumping him and moving on to another. Olivia offered no explanation, so he didn’t know how to avoid becoming another statistic in Grace’s dating life. But he tried his best.

  He always treated her with the respect she deserved. He was very careful not to pressure her physically, although she was really hard to resist with such an amazing body. It was all he could do to keep his hands from straying below her neck, but something had told him that would be a death sentence.

  The doorbell rang and his heart skipped a beat. Maybe it was all in his head. Maybe everything would be fine. Maybe he wasn’t going to have his heart cut out and handed to him on a platter. But when he grabbed the knob to open the door, a chill ran right up his arm and into his spine. He shivered as the door opened and Grace swept into the room.

  Brad swallowed hard as Grace stepped inside, looking a nervous as a bird in a roomful of cats. Once again he berated himself for his words last weekend. Why did I tell her I loved her? I knew she wasn’t ready. Eight weeks of careful work to build up her trust, down the drain with three little words.

  “I’ve missed you, Grace. I was worried when you didn’t answer my calls last night.”

  He braced himself when her arms moved toward him, relaxing as they wrapped around his neck, pulling his face down to hers. He didn’t resist as she offered her lips to him, kissing him with a passion he couldn’t help but answer. He snaked his arms around her waist and squeezed as if he could hold her there forever.

  Wow, I guess she forgave me.

  “Hi guys!” said Josh, stepping into the living room. “Hope I’m not interrupting anything.” He flopped onto the couch and propped his feet on the footstool.

  Grace swirled to face him, tugging her skirt down as two bright red spots appeared on her cheeks.

  Josh raised his eyebrows and grinned. “Looks like you two weren’t planning on me being here.”

  “Don’t you have someplace to go?” Brad ground through gritted teeth.

  “Not really,” said Josh, picking up the television remote. “I thought I’d just watch a movie or something.”

  Brad was trying to decide how to dispose of his roommate’s body when Josh busted out laughing and stood up. “I’m just kidding. I’m going to have dinner with Spencer and Emily. Don’t do anything I wouldn’t do,” he warned as he slipped past them out the front door, his laughter trailing behind him.

  Brad let out the breath he’d been holding when the door closed behind Josh. His eyes sought out Grace’s, and he saw something there he hadn’t noticed when she walked into the apartment. Fear.

  *****

  Grace stiffened as he stared into her eyes. It always seemed like he could see into her soul, and it made her feel out of control.

  “You seem tense, Grace. Why don’t you let me rub your shoulders for you?”

  He urged her to sit on the footstool while he sat behind her. His large strong hands began to knead her muscles. She almost melted as the tension she wasn’t even aware of began to leave her body.

  She thought about the close call at the front door. It was a good thing Josh had appeared when he did. She needed to keep her mind distracted, separated from the sensations that always overwhelmed her when Brad kissed her. She’d thought if she initiated the kissing, if she was the one in control, she’d be able to control her emotions as well. But it hadn’t quite worked according to her plan. She had to be more careful.

  “Mmmm, that’s nice,” she murmured as she scooted back onto the couch beside him, snuggling under his arm. She reached her hand to stroke his face and let her fingers drop to amble across his muscular chest. His hand reached out to stroke her cheek, causing her thoughts to jumble in her head.

  He bent his face to capture her lips in a tender kiss, sweet and chaste, full of promise. With only the slightest pressure of his mouth on hers, her heart began to thud and warmth spread throughout her entire body. When he withdrew his mouth, she whimpered and tried to follow him, her parched lips seeking the satisfaction only he could give.

  He chuckled. “It makes me feel a little better you seem to want it as much as I do.” He stretched his arms above his head and stood up. “What do you want to do tonight? Do you feel like going out? Would you like to watch the game down at O’Malley’s?”

  “You want to go out?” Inside her chest, her heart thudded against her ribcage. “I thought... you know... since we were alone, I figured you’d want to stay here.”

  His mouth lifted on one corner in a crooked grin. “I’d like to stay here alone with you, but I can already tell that’s a bad idea. We’d better leave while we still can.”

  Grace felt her breath coming faster and faster until her head was swimming. If we leave now, I won’t have any reason to break up with him. And he’ll be sweet to me, and I’ll fall even harder for him. If I’m not careful, I’ll fall in love with him. I can’t let that happen.


  “Grace? What’s wrong?”

  She stood up and backed toward the door with one hand in front of her to ward him off. She didn’t know what she was going to do, but she knew she couldn’t stay.

  “What’s wrong? Where are you going?”

  She shook her head and continued her backward trek until she found the door with her foot. He continued to advance, but she slipped out the door and shut it behind her, holding it tightly.

  The door jerked out of her hands. “Grace, what are you trying to do? You can’t lock me inside my apartment. I don’t understand what happened. What’s wrong? Talk to me!” He gripped her shoulders and held her motionless. She stared at him, unseeing.

  “Grace, I’m not letting you go until you tell me what’s wrong.”

  Panicking, she gasped for air. What am I going to do? What should I say?

  “I... It’s... There’s someone else...” Tears welled in her eyes and rolled down her wooden cheeks. It was almost true. She planned to date someone else—she simply hadn’t met him yet.

  “What? What are you saying?”

  “There’s someone else... Another guy... I can’t see you anymore.” She looked up though watery eyes and saw his face splinter.

  “I don’t believe it! You’re lying, aren’t you? What’s his name?”

  Thrum. Thrum. Thrum. Her heartbeat banged inside her ears, almost drowning out his voice. Why did I say I was dating someone? What do I do now? I can’t even think of a pretend name. Wait... “Horatio... His name is Horatio.”

  “How could you do this? What did I do wrong?” His voice cracked and he turned his head away, but she saw the wetness on his face.

  “I’m sorry,” she choked out.

  “Why Grace?” Brad fell back against the door and slid slowly to the ground. “We were so good together.” Grace saw him bury his face in his hands before she turned to walk away.

  Chapter Two

  Grace felt achy, inside and out, like she had the flu—only this flu made her emotions sick too. She was angry with herself for hurting Brad. She still couldn’t get the image of his stricken face out of her mind. She’d meant to break off the relationship without hurting him any more than necessary, but her plan had failed. Her lie had injured him severely, but it was too late for the truth now. She ought to feel a sense of relief she was free from her weighty relationship with Brad. She couldn’t understand why her heart was so heavy, unless it was a sense of guilt.

  Perhaps she simply needed more time—it had only been one weekend since the fateful breakup. The sight of her puffy swollen eyes in the mirror almost made another barrage of tears come. But it was Monday, and she had to go to the school and be cheery for all of those six-year-olds who were counting on her. After splashing cold water on her face and applying a generous portion of concealer, she forced herself to head to work and put up a brave front.

  The day dragged on. Her pulse was rapid as she checked her cell phone for messages, but there was still no word from Brad. Not that she wanted him to contact her. She wanted a clean break—they both needed to move on. Even though she’d done a poor job of breaking up, it was probably the best thing for Brad. He could find someone else—someone who would be thrilled if he professed his love for her. He deserved that.

  She was meeting Josh after work, hoping to hear news of Brad. Josh might already hate her if Brad had told him she was dating someone else. So be it. Right now, she hated herself for lying.

  Josh hadn’t told Brad he was meeting Grace for dinner. He knew about the breakup, but Brad wouldn’t give any details. And now his roommate was avoiding him and all of his other friends except for the necessary interactions at the hospital. He recognized the signs of heartbreak since he’d been living with it for several months. He owed it to Brad to see if he could help.

  “Hey Grace. You look great,” he said with a bright forced smile, thinking she looked rather rough.

  “Thanks Josh, but I know better.” She rubbed the bridge of her nose. “Tell me the truth... How’s he doing?”

  “He’s... He’s surviving. What happened, Grace? You two looked like things were going just fine when I left the other day. In fact, it looked like things were more than fine.” He chuckled a bit.

  He saw her face flush as she kept her eyes glued to the table. “Uhmm... What did he tell you?”

  Josh tilted his head and studied her. She was definitely hiding something. “Not much. Just that you weren’t who he thought you were.” He reached for a slice of pizza and attacked it with zeal.

  Her face turned several shades of pink and red. “I broke up with him so I could date someone else.”

  “Really? Who is this guy?”

  “His name is, uhmm... his name is Horatio. But I don’t want to talk about him. I want to talk about Brad. Is he okay? I know he’s mad, but...” Her voice cracked and her hand swiped quickly at her face.

  “He’s hurt and upset, Grace. How did you think he would be?” Josh failed to keep the annoyance from his voice, but he regretted his harsh tone when he heard a sob.

  “I know. It’s totally my f-fault. I just s-sort of went crazy.”

  “So let me get this straight,” he said between bites. “You had a hot make-out session and then went crazy and broke up with him so you could date someone else? Is that right? I don’t get it... If you want to date someone else, why do you care what Brad thinks anymore?”

  “I don’t know. It sounds w-worse when you s-say it that way. We needed to break up, but I didn’t want to h-hurt him.”

  “I thought you and Brad really liked each other. Why did you start dating someone else?”

  Grace shrugged, sniffing. “He was getting too serious.”

  Huh! It’s usually a guy saying stuff like this. I don’t think I’ve ever heard it from a girl. “What exactly is too serious? What do you mean by that?”

  “He said he loved me.”

  Now Josh felt defensive. He’d told Charlie the same thing. A guy shouldn’t be penalized for speaking about love if it was true. “What’s wrong with that? Why wouldn’t you want him to love you?”

  “But I don’t feel the same way.”

  “Yet,” he corrected. “You don’t feel the same way yet. Why won’t you give him a chance? What’s this Horatio guy got that Brad doesn’t have?” Josh snagged another slice of pizza.

  “Horatio doesn’t want to get married.”

  “Brad was pressuring you to get married?”

  “Well, no... but... but he... but I didn’t want a serious relationship. So I had to end it while I could, before anyone got hurt.”

  “You mean, before you got hurt? Because Brad already got hurt, didn’t he?”

  “It’s for the best. If I had let it go on any longer, it would have hurt him even more. He deserves someone who can love him back.”

  “But you’d rather have this Horatio guy? How well do you know him?”

  “Well enough.” Josh saw Grace’s chin jut out.

  “Look, I’m just going to go out on a limb here and say you look almost as miserable as Brad. I wonder if it’s possible you like Brad more than you’re admitting.”

  “I’m not in love with Brad!” Grace’s face was flushed, and she wadded up the napkin in her hand.

  Josh sat back and folded his arms, studying her flushed face. “Okay, if you say so. However, I would like to point out I only suggested you liked him. So it seems the person whom you’re trying to convince you’re not in love with Brad... is you.”

  Her eyes grew wide and her breathing was so rapid he thought she might hyperventilate. “I... I don’t...”

  “I think you should call him or text him. I think you guys need to talk.”

  Grace shook her head rapidly as she grabbed her glass and gulped her water.

  He continued, “I think you could work it out if you would just sit down and talk. And you need to dump this Horatio guy, and figure out how you feel about Brad.”

  “I... I don’t think...”
/>   “Just admit it. You made a mistake, didn’t you? You regret breaking up?”

  Her eyes closed as huge crocodile tears slid down her face, and she nodded her head.

  “Just talk to him.”

  “I don’t even understand how I feel. How can I explain it to him? And anyway, it’s too late. He won’t want to talk to me now. And he’s better off without me.”

  “He deserves to make that call himself. Just try. If he refuses to talk to you, then at least you can say you tried,” Josh said around a mouthful of pizza. “Call him. Or better yet, come up to the hospital tomorrow morning and talk to him in person. We’re both on duty starting at six.”

  “I don’t know... What if he won’t talk to me?”

  “If it doesn’t go well, I’ll call you and we’ll figure out the next step.”

  “No, don’t bother calling. If it doesn’t go well, I’ll take it as a sign I was right and we should break up.”

  “Whatever. I’m sure by tomorrow night everything will be fine. Are you going to eat that pizza?” Josh asked, indicting the slice on her plate. When she turned up her nose he snatched it from her plate with enthusiasm. He’d done a great job of counseling Grace. Maybe he should have been a psychiatrist. No—it was way too stressful. He’d better stick with emergency medicine.

  *****

  Brad checked his cell phone again on his way to work Tuesday morning—still no word from Grace. Well, good riddance to her. She’d dumped him and he hadn’t done anything to deserve it. He wasn’t even sure Horatio existed. He suspected the whole breakup occurred because he’d confessed his love for her. Why couldn’t she be like every other girl he knew? Most girls would be thrilled to hear those three coveted words from their boyfriends, wouldn’t they? Usually, the guys were the ones with commitment issues. He wasn’t planning to go begging for her to come back to him. If she wanted him, she knew where to find him. And even as angry as he was, he’d take her back in a second. He couldn’t stop thinking about her.

  “Hey Dr. Gates? Why so glum?”